Jania's Story

Jania is very thin, and very beautiful. She looks more Russian than Polish and reminds me of Kitty in Dostoevsky's Anna Karenina. Her eyes are full of life, her cheekbones are high and she polishes cutlery in the back of an Italian restaurant. She is 23 years old, like me, and yet she sees her life as one filled with opportunity. Jania's optimism is striking. She loves nature, exercise and parks and she loves Hyde Park. The way she pronounces Hyde Park is delicate: Hyde becomes Hy-ed, just like the Israeli's make their country into a three syllable word.

"It's very hot in here." We're both polishing cutlery furiously. There is a constant knife shortage in the restaurant and each shift I've worked another packet of knives is circulated, and yet there is always a customer demanding the second half of his cutlery set. Jania's face gleams with sweat as we both feed cutlery into the polisher. The whole staff are in general agreement that the machine does nothing. Each knife comes out grainier than when it went in before, so our work is doubled. Company policy tells us that we must feed cutlery through the machine, and yet we must also scrub it by hand too.

"This job is so tiring" says Jania, with a smile. Every complaint she makes, she smiles, as if to soften the blow.  I ask her if she works full time.

"At the moment I work full time yes. I came here a year ago to work and I'm still here. I want to study here as well though, but it will be very expensive because I already have a first degree."

Guiltily, this revelation shocked me. In three weeks, it was the first time she had mentioned having a degree.

"Yes, it's in social work. I really want to be a social worker."

I ask her why she's here if she wants to be a social worker.

"In Poland, life is hard. A professional wage can be as low as £300 a month. With the Euro, the prices of everything are really high, and it is a struggle. The only thing that is different, are the, how do you say, apartments, rooms? The cost of those in Poland are a lot lower than here."

I explain that London can feel like a separate country to the rest of England, and if she wanted cheaper rent the whole of the UK didn't cost the same as London.

"Ok, that's good to know, but I want to be here, in London. I have a boyfriend here now. And then I can save to study. I just want to read all the time to help me get on the degree course. I think I want to study psychology on top of my first degree so I can really specialise in social work. I'm reading Freud at the moment, in English. It is a challenge, but it is so interesting."

At the risk of sounding like someone from Ukip, I asked her why she wants to pursue Social Work in England rather than Poland.

"The money, and of course, I know that England is short of social workers because is it perceived to be a difficult job. It is a challenge to come to the UK and do this."

I found it difficult to work out why, other than money, she had to come to the UK to do social work. There are plenty of people in Poland who need caring for. I wondered whether Polish immigration was motivated by something other than money.

"My mother left my sister and I when I was 17 to go to Italy to find work. My father works in plant near our town. A lot of people leave. How do I feel about it? I like the EU, as it means that I can earn more money waitressing here than I could at home. I know, the cost of living is higher, but, it's nice."

Do you send money home?

"No because my sister is an English teacher so she earns enough. And my mother is still in Italy working. It is very bad for families at the moment. We are all split up and we don't see each other. I worry that the future of Poland will not have the family at the heart, because I know in my generation, so many people are leaving to find work abroad that we don't feel we have families any more. We are all separate."

And yet people  keep leaving?

"It is seen as successful to leave and earn money abroad. There is nothing for me in Poland. My mother is not there, there is no motivation to be there."

But is this exodus sustainable? I asked her whether she would go back?

"I think it is the dream of most Polish people to work somewhere like England for 10 years in whatever job they can do, and then go back to Poland to start a family when they're like, 30 years. That is when they start doing the job that they dreamed of in High School."

I asked what the dream of most polish girls was when they left school.

"Some want to be famous, just like the whole world. But many want to be teachers, and nanny's. We have to be realistic in Poland."

So what was her plan now? Jania had been working at the restaurant for a year now and she still hadn't been promoted from back of house cutlery polisher to waitress because of her language skills. Jania who reads Freud and hopes to become a psychologist after being a social worker.

"Now, I save for my degree. I want to do here, in England. And then I will get experience for free by volunteering with social workers. And then hopefully I can get a job. My polish degree is not worth anything here because I need to translate all the papers and it's not the same as the UK. It's tiring. Sometimes I want to make myself feel happy, you know?"

And her always optimistic face momentarily creased into a frown.

It's not just me.

The word job can be read in several ways. It can mean job as in a part-time job, a Saturday job, the odd paper-boy shift, a career or a dream. I'm still job-hungry. Currently I work 45 hours a week as a waitress during the evening and weekends, and 40 hours a week during the day for Time Out as an Intern. I have been accepted onto a course to study Magazine Journalism come September, but right now, I don't feel as though I have a job yet. I have a means to pay my way, and a selection of choices that will help me attain my dream job. I'm in limbo, waiting. 

At work number two last night I was cleaning a table when I noticed a former editor of my student newspaper sitting with a friend. "I'm a news producer for Sky", he told me. We exchanged handshakes and comments about the state of our lives, and agreed to organise a Palatinate alumni get-together again at some point. I was enormously impressed with what he had a achieved, and I couldn't help but stop and look at myself, cutlery tray in hand, aching feet and a smelly dishcloth in my waitressing pouch, its wetness slowly seeping through my apron to leave a damp spot. 

I went into the back of the restaurant and slowly put some lipstick stained glasses into the machine. I had chosen to be here and I was angry that I had to be. I had a deep, flashing moment of frustration with myself for not taking my place at City immediately out of university. I could have been done by June. I would be a journalist, not an intern-come-cutlery polisher. But this is the path I chose, and the mistakes I made somewhere along the line have contributed to my current exhaustion. Last night, stacking the glasses into the dishwasher, I realised that I had lost the core of what I was even doing there, why I was there in the first place. It was to keep my dream of becoming a journalist alive, I reminded myself. This is what we all have to do. But it had become a robotic existence.

At home, my book lay unfinished, one chapter to go until the end. Three articles that I had offered to write for Time Out were unwritten, with no foreseeable time in which to write them. I don't even have time to eat a meal. A box of as high-calorie food as I can find-polenta, tofu or mushrooms-eaten quickly on the 15 minute bus journey home at 1am. And the endless days in the stuffy Time Out office where I struggle to keep my eyes open and focus on the screen. The feedback from editors, silly mistakes from not proof-reading because my eyes just won't stay open. And when they all received the Time Out card for staff members, a card that entitles you to 50% off dining out and none of the interns did, my first thought was not of exploitation, but instead realised that this would increase customers at the restaurant where I worked.

In perpetuum. 

But something shook me out of this self-pitying mess. Something that made me open up my laptop and restart this blog. Compared to other people, my life is easy. 

And the following posts, will be their stories. 

Graduate Scheme Panic

We’ve all got friends like it. Maybe you were one. Maybe I was. Who knows. 

“Fancy a drink?”

“Sorry, can’t I’ve got Amnesty/Foodwaste/Save the puppies AGM”

“Tomorrow lunchtime?”

“Lunchtimes? Are you serious? I’m interviewing local councillor/David Bowie/the Queen”

And now, post-university, they’re unemployed. They got a 2:1 (achievable), joined and ran every club under the sun (harder) and are personable. But they don’t have a job.

What went wrong?  I have several friends in this position and almost all of them have one thing in common:

They blindly applied for graduate roles.

Graduate roles are seen as the be all and end all of a university career. No graduate role? You are derided, cast aside and rejected by the university alumni people who call you up every week asking you what your leaver’s destination is.

“Seeking employment?” they sniff? “Did you not get on a graduate scheme?”

The phone line mysteriously goes dead. Your university doesn’t want you as a statistic. Seeking further employment doesn’t look great when they’re trying to attract new blood. 

“Oh him?” They’ll tell their supervisor. “No, we couldn’t get through.” And your number will be erased from the university alumni relations office contact book.

 But applying for too many roles when at uni, or post uni, is dangerous too. At some point you stop caring what the results of these applications will be. Graduate scheme at British Tobacco? Oh ok then, might as well. But you won’t get it, because you really couldn’t give a shit. The big four? KPMG? PWC? Well, are you good at  maths? No, but, well, go on, you might as well. And then you get rejected.

Because they know you didn’t wake up that morning, punching the air and saying: “Yes, one more step towards a lifelong career in audit!”

As previous posts have shown however, just because you want something like crazy, it doesn’t mean you’ll get that either. BBC graduate scheme-didn’t even get an interview. And I pretty much ticked every box going. And then some. Because graduate schemes are not the be all and end all. Focus on small production companies. Approach a small newspaper. Call up a regional auditors in your parents local town. Any architects nearby who’ll take you on for a few weeks of work experience?

Graduate schemes aren’t always glamorous. And quite often they can drag you through the hoops with you unwillingly holding the reigns with one hand. At each step you question whether you want it. But you keep getting through until the final selection day when you’re hideously rejected. And then you realised after all that work, preparation and effort, you’re still no closer to getting a job and the end of university is just 4 weeks away.

But don’t panic. Don’t apply blindly. Don’t rush yourself off your feet trying to fit mad amounts on your CV.  Relax, think about your point. What do you think you were put on this earth to do? What would you like to do? Because my guess was it wasn’t to end up working in a faceless office in front of a computer counting steel-piping imports. And if this was your dream, and you’ve achieved it: well done!

Being a fashion intern

So far it’s been less like Devil Wears Prada and more like the sofa of my kitchen on a rainy Sunday afternoon. People are constantly on a migration towards the teapot, huddled with laptops, casually typing out stories and shouting jokes around the room. In essence, it's essentially like any other office I’ve worked in, except there’s music.

Time Out is a  fantastic place to work and everybody is incredibly friendly, if a little busy.

My work so far has not been confined to coffee runs. Instead I’ve been in touch with PRs, writing out reams and reams of listings, generally getting confused with the image uploader they’ve got here. Most difficult, I've had to work out what Miu Miu means.

I am not your stereotypical Fashion Intern. For one, I don’t really care about fashion, and, as I pass the theatre/food/travel desks my head inclines wistfully towards them. But it’s a great step in the right direction and it mans that I get to shock friends and family with style advice. This comes from somebody who is happiest in leggings and oversized tee. 

I don't think it's going to turn me into some crazy Rachel Zoe lookalike (see! Fashion reference!!!), but it's making me appreciate the work that goes into producing a magazine as 'simple' as Time Out. 

 

How to get a job in London

Ok, so the job market is horrendous worldwide, apart from perhaps, Australia. Otherwise, the streets are akin to the 1930s. Even the colour has been sapped from the London streets, everything is in sepia, and for some reason, men have started wearing cloth caps and have swapped their Nikes for large shoes with gaping holes in the toes. Yes, we’re in a vast, yawning hole of depression, but there are still jobs to be had in London town, just how to go about it.

• Ensure you have friends in high places. This is easier said than done, obviously, but loitering around in coffee shops does have its advantages when it comes to making connections. I have now been offered a grand total of two jobs, just from having the fortune of sitting next to the right people at the right time. One man insisted that I come and interview for a job at his ski and snowboard company, despite the fact that I can’t ski or snowboard. Another man eyeballed my pictures that I was doctoring on my laptops and gave me a business card for freelance photography. I still earn money this way. So if you’re particularly lazy, and you prefer the idea of loafing around drinking hot beverages all day over, then waiting for the job to come to you is one way of succeeding in the London job market. I am proof that it can happen, you just a happy smile and to look job hungry.

• Go classic. Local restaurants and bars will respond to your efforts to traipse around the capital handing out promising looking CVs to all and sundry. Open the door to the establishment with a smile, extend your arm to the manager for a polite handshake and state why you’re there. Hopefully this will be enough to show the place you want employment in that you’re an excellent choice and that if nothing else, you have the stamina to be on your feet for hours on end.

• Do what my friend did and stand out from the crowd with quirky CVs. One of my friends, desperate to get a job in PR, poked his CV into a balloon, filled it with Helium and then left it at several PR firms, hoping to get their attention. He labelled it as a gift to the boss and provided a handy pin to prick the rubber. Do your research first: a small quirky surprise to a young PR manager could be a fatal shock induced heart attack to an older one. Worked for my friend though: he was offered called for five interviews in as many hours. While I don’t suggest that you copy this idea to the letter, other ideas are delivering your CV wearing fancy dress, presenting your CV in a 3D origami shape (if this is at all relevant to your job-perhaps applying to be a burger flipper in Maccy D’s won’t call for such a level of creativity) or making a hanging mobile out of your CV and sending it in a package to PR firms nationwide.

• Get in touch with a recruitment agency. Sometimes, these places can help to place you with the company of your dreams. Often, they arrange a little pre-interview with you first to make sure that you’re not going to embarrass them. Just make sure you’re clear about what type of job you’re looking for. I once went for an interview with an internet company who quizzed me about my computer coding skills and looked more and more dejected with every answer I offered. At no point had the recruitment consultancy suggested that I would need to be able to program or build websites: they’d told me that they were looking for someone to write product descriptions. Mad.

• Move out to the provinces. A growing number of graduates are opting not to move to London to find work. Despite the feeling that London is almost a primate city in the UK, more and more jobs are being found outside the capital for graduates. Jaguar Landrover recently offered a shedload of engineering roles for new engineering and physics students, while the BBC’s move to Salford has ensured that it’s no longer imperative for debt-ridden graduates to shell out more money for London accommodation. The big cities of Manchester, Edinburgh, Glasgow, Leeds and Birmingham have a variety of jobs on offer, and, best of all, you’re less likely to be competing with EU workers who come to London tempted by the glitz, the glam and the exceptional restaurants. No-one ever went to Manchester for the glitz and the glam. 

I didn't get rejected SHOCK

Sometimes the JobHungryGrad really has to pinch herself. This often occurs when I've received rejection letters from companies I haven't even applied for or been invited to job interviews. This is such a rare occurance that sometimes JobHungryGrad's partner need to get the smelling salts out to revive her before she has the energy to blog about receiving an invite. Seeing as I don't often get job offers (it's the nature of the role of being constantly JobHungry) I rarely register shock at getting a job offer. Let's just say I'm out of practice.

So my initial reaction was this:

How do I celebrate a feeling other than rejection?

I have a job offer. Interesting new concept.

Relief: it's all over now (apart from the need to  apply for extra income part time job

But this is the anger for all the grads out there who are still wasting their wonderful young lives trying to find the elusive job of their dreams. Don't give up. Fierce determination. Pride. And lots of love from JobHungryGrad. 

When you want a job so badly but the subject matter is a little...different

Time Out are interviewing me today for a Shopping and Style position. Anyone who knows me will know that I'm interested in colours, textures, fabrics and designs, but have never spent more than £100 on a piece of clothing. Will this automatically exclude me? Most of my favourite pieces were either handmade by friends or found in the bottom of 123 Bethnal Green bargain bin basket. 

So we have a problem.

Do I spend the last few hours before my interview cramming like hell on Mount St. stores and Ledbury Street designers? Or do I just admit that I'm most interested in Food Shopping, Furniture Stores and Pop-up clothes bin shops? 

I have all the skills for this position, I just hope I can twist my interests to fit the evidently fashion oriented post style. It won't be the first time I've tried it. Hopefully, third time lucky. Wish JobHungryGrad luck!

How to get a job? Top recruiters reveal industry secrets

Because I've been feeling a little fed up with getting nowhere at all on the job application front, I decided to do a little bit of interviewing for graduate advice. I asked three top recruiting agencies what their advice was when it came to graduates who were just trying to get their feet in the doors.

"You find a lot of graduates with lots of experience in one area, be it university events or sport organisation blindly applying for sales jobs. They think they have the skills, but if they aren't passionate about earning money and reaching targets then they'll never get that job. Transferable skills aren't really valued any more. Instead, you need blind, focused experience."

What about for those grads who just aren't sure what they want and are trying to make their minds up in a difficult job market?

"Those sorts of grads won't get jobs in today's market. The market is so competitive these days that you won't get a job if you just want to 'try it out'. I advise all grads who aren't sure what they want to do to complete some kind of internship or unpaid work placement so they can get a real taste for the field they want to go into".

On average, how many job applications do you get per job? 

"Well, obviously it completely depends, but often no fewer than 800 per job. Often the numbers push into the thousands for the more popular jobs."

And how do recruiters whittle down 1000 to 1?

"By reading and evaluating applications carefully and eradicating ones with silly mistakes or those with not enough experience." 

Are you sure that they don't just throw half in the bin to reduce numbers, I jokingly asked?

"Of course not." Icy silence.

So how do people get that elusive job then?

"By having exceptional amounts of experience, a CV that stands out, and an excellent degree result."

How do graduates get lots of experience?

"By doing unpaid work experience."

And how do they afford that when they come out of university with lots of debt?

"I know, the job market is incredibly tough right now. But graduates will just have to take a further loan out, or ask their parents for more help to get the experience."

What's the most common mistake graduates make on applications?

"Apart from strange punctuation sometimes, it's sending out the same generic CV and covering letter to every employer. More time needs to be spent on these CVs. If you're going to be competing against 1000 other applicants, it really has to be top notch. Also, graduates often apply for events assistants after working in events at university. It just isn't the same. You need more experience."

Any tips or advice?

"Don't forget, in this market, you're often competing against people who have been made redundant in these areas. A lot of the time senior events managers are applying for junior jobs, editors are applying for editorial assistantships. You have to be very, very good to stand out.".

I thanked them all for their time. 

JobHungryGrad says enough when...

...When I get rejected from a job I didn't even apply for. For some reason I had an email in my inbox telling me that Deutsche Bank were unable to continue my application for the position of Analyst.

Well, er great?

How has it come to this?

Are companies actively seeking me out just to send me rejection letters for kicks?

Deutsche Bank: at least let me spend three days writing and perfecting my application to you before you reject me next time!

JobHungryGrad is hungry...

...for a job

If you know of one that doesn't include the words 'recruitment' or 'media sales' in the title, it will probably be good enough for me.

Unfortunately in 2013, you don't get to choose your career, just the way you cope with what's dealt to you.

Bisous and thanks all

x

Pret: Just be thankful...

Thankful though I am to be allowed to nest in the corner of Pret a Manger eating Sea Salt and Cider Vinegar hand cooked crisps and drinking Americanos, one thing the JobHungryGrad is very grateful for is not having to work at Pret.

Here is some insane job related information about Pret:

• Apparently Pret employs 1 in 14 applicants, which is an insanely small number. 
• Pret employees have to demonstrate that they are 'inwardly happy with themselves'. 
• Mystery shoppers use Pret once a week. When I worked at a very well known restaurant chain we were threatened with mystery shoppers all the time but we never got one once, because we never had any feedback from them.

Nobody who works at Pret can be inwardly happy. Is anybody really inwardly happy? Am I being a miserable JHG whose just jealous of people who work at Pret because they're employed?

 Maybe. 

Graduates: Are these even real jobs?

Just a quick question. Everyone is always telling me that there are millions of jobs available. Log on to www.guardian.co.uk/jobs and you'll see that there are hundreds for graduates.

You know the ones, the ones that say base salary £18000, potential OTE £80k!!

But are they real? Are they good? Are they all essentially advertising the same jobs? To become cold callers?

Did all of us JobHungryGrads out there really get a first from Hertford College. Oxford to cold call people? Or a Masters from Newcastle to ask people whether they want froth on their cappuccino  Of course we did, now quit complaining, and here, below are a selection of jobs that are *always* available.

Are they even real? If you do one of these jobs, what on earth do you do? And do you ever earn the promised £100k OTE? Do you heck.

• Social Media Sales role, £25K -£50K

  • London (City of)
  • Very Competitive
  Very fast paced environment which rewards those who work hard

• Social Media Specialist - London - £35k - International In-house Wine Company

  • Greater London
  • Up to £35k (DOE) with Great Benefits
  My client, a international Wine company, seek a Social Media Specialist/Online Community Manager to join their sociable and talented team. 

  Because all the graduates I know are specialists in Social Media, after completing a 3 year philosophy degree

Why it's important not to isolate yourself

Pret a Manger provides comfortable seats, ample plug sockets and an environment of white noise. At this Pret in Victoria, I'm starting to recognise the people around me. A teacher to my left, who comes to Pret to mark his papers in his free lesson periods. The server who knows what coffee I want in the morning (although the real coffee I want here is 'None Pret, your coffee tastes like grit') and the two girls who have more work coffee breaks than I'm sure their company allows.

It's nowhere near as sociable and friendly as a real workplace, but at least JobHungryGrad doesn't feel isolated and stuck at home.

I think isolation is the most danger that an unemployed graduate looking for work can put themselves in. There is a feeling that its totally possible to disappear from society and that nobody would notice. You, locked alone in your house, in a London suburb, could very easily disappear from the network and no-one would know. Of course, it's not true, but full days of having to converse with your mind, your fingers, and whoever might email you during the working day can leave you with a sense of solitude to the extent that you  start to feel as though you might be auditioning for the leading role in Gabriel Garcia Marquez' seminal tome.

If you're one of these filthy job-hunting scroungers, get to a coffee shop, zone into your work for the week and get on it. Hint number two: dress up. I'm wearing formal clothes because it makes me feel as though I'm 'really' working. Wear a hoody and gym leggings and chances are people won't take you quite as seriously.

Plus, good things come from working in coffee shops looking nice:

• On friday I got asked out on a date by a hot Danish guy 
• I've been given business cards from people after we've got chatting and they've heard my sad and desperate JobHungrySadGrad situation
• I got free coffee in Pret last week. I KNOW. 

Plus be courteous with your table/laptop space, or if you want to annoy telegraph readers, go crazy:

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/9254698/Wi-fi-lingerers-in-coffee-shops-are-causing-territorial-disputes-academic-research-finds.html

It has been six days...

It has been 6 days since I last posted in this blog. Congratulations, JobHungryGrad must be busy with her new, high-powered 9-5 executive graduate position! Well done JobHungryGrad!

*Cue hollow laugh

Instead I have been writing. Writing won't get me a high powered 9-5 but it has brought me a sense of fulfillment and happiness. But that's not as important as money, is it? Because when we die, after a short average of 78 years on this beautiful, wonderful planet we call home, whether or not we achieved enlightenment will be ignored: instead what will count is the financial legacy that we will leave to our children and grandchildren.

Isn't it?

Recently, I watched all three (long story) of my grandmothers die or grow old while losing all the money they had managed to put away for a 'rainy day' because they had money, so they had to pay full fees for their nursing homes or house-care. Those who had less, were given grants or their 'fees' for these NHS services were subsidized.

This is not me, at 23, throwing down my towel and declaring that from now on, I will forgo work because I don't want to pay my nursing home fees. That would be ridiculous. But my generation now has a painful and lengthy period of financial woe ahead of us: in my graduate job I worked my ass off. And for what? My current housemates get in at 10pm and leave at 6am. Why? And for what?

For money? To survive? To achieve? To fulfill their ambition?

Or because we are expected to?

What is the right thing to do?

My generation has many questions, and perhaps, Messrs Cameron and Clegg, we'd like them answered. Where will all this lead, and when will this stupidity, this waste of human resources cease? 

Life cannot continue like this.

When an interview goes tits up

Excuse my French, but when I showed up for an interview this morning (after guessing where it was because I hadn't got an invite) I was given a task that I should have been given the weekend to prepare for but they forgot to send me the email.

God knows if I'll get the job, but in that situation, JobHungryGrad suggests that you smile, remain polite and just grit your teeth. Don't worry, you're not totally worthless, it's just the interviewer is super busy and the reality is, you are at the bottom of the pile, but it's imperative that you remain professional and try not to let it panic you. Perhaps it was all intentional, perhaps this is the interviewer's way of putting you under pressure.

With one interview down, and one to go tomorrow morning that I want more than anything in the world, I'm feeling good.

I'm preparing for tomorrows interview by memorizing why they're hiring, what the job will entail and scenarios that I've undertaken that will fit the brief. I always get a little concerned when the brief is so vague. I easily fit the criteria, and presumably so do one million and one other people. So how I was chosen for interview, I'm not sure. What will mark me out as better, I don't know.

I've just got to keep trying and remind myself to live in the moment, just in case tomorrow goes tits up too.

Career tips from Rattigan-a night at the Old Vic

On Saturday night I went to see the Wilnslow Boy at the Old Vic, a heartwarming play by Terence Rattigan about a father's fight to do justice by his son. As a JobHungryGrad, although I was impressed by the lighting/acting/scenery, I listened carefully to Kate's story in the play. 

Kate is the female protagonist in the play, a feisty and powerful woman, who puts justice before her own personal happiness. In the play she rejects a marriage offer in favour of continuing the case to help her younger brother out. She openly reads books by socialist leaders and she comes out as a suffragette within the earliest moments of the play.

Kate is likable and fantastically determined. At one point however when her father is riddled with exhaustion and arthritis, and Kate has been jilted by her lover and admits to being paid just £2 a week by the suffragettes, there is an emotional moment when she opens her heart to her father and to the audience.

"[The suffragette movement] feels like a hopeless cause."
"A hopeless cause? I've never heard you say that before."
"I've never felt it before".

It shows that even the most remarkable and strongwilled people have their moments where they feel completely lost and unsure as to the direction they're going in. The father's arthritis worsens and the young boy Ronnie, whom the play is all about, begins to grow up and care less about the situation he was placed in when a 5 shilling postal order was stolen at school. The characters grow up and the family loses money trying to pay for better lawyers to defend their child. Despite these situational tremors, the case is won.

"Yes father, it would appear that we've won," says Kate at the end of the play. There is no celebration, no joy, just an acknowledgement that 'right has been done'. The family are exhausted, weakened by the experience, but, as her father says: "I wouldn't have done anything differently."

I hope that this job hunt ends with a positive result.

Like Kate, I won't celebrate brashly, because I know that at the end of all this, if it ever does end, I'll be exhausted and relieved.

But I'd like it to end eventually, because I want to prove, just like Kate and her father, that I can win and defeat the odds.

Monday morning and the quest for blue and white enamel

This morning felt a little Joycian. I had decided to task myself with recording exactly how a JobHungryGrad feels on a Monday morning, when the rest of the world has disappeared off to their offices and places of learning, and is left at the kitchen table drinking tea in front of their red laptop.

Next to me is a small pile of crusts (I have not yet reached the depths of unemployed graduate poverty that I will willingly eat the crusts of a week old gluten-free loaf). My left hand's ring finger is sticky with marmalade, so I am taking care not to allow it to touch the keyboard. My tea is simmering in a white and blue enamel mug. And what a mug. It is a fabulous, light, unbreakable mug which started my quest to replenish my crockery stash with a row of blue and white enamel mugs hanging off hooks in our new kitchen. (http://www.surplusandoutdoors.com/shop/camping-equipment/plates-enamel-wear.html)

My excitement was fueled by the discovery that it's also possible to buy a classic blue and white enamel pie dish and a classic enamel Billy Can. The Billy Can I can understand, but who goes camping and bakes a pie? How do you bake a pie in a tent? All the more questions for the JobHungryGrad to query during the long week ahead.

Otherwise, I feel happy. I had an incredible weekend, and and have an invite to interview tomorrow. It's unlikely I'll get it and the hours are long and yes, it's based in an office, but it fits my schedule and I crave human interaction.

I went to an incredible coffee shop in Shoreditch yesterday (www.weekendnotes.co.uk/fix-126-cafe-shoreditch-it's got the best coffee in the whole of London) and sat down with my boyfriend to make a comprehensive list of everything I want to achieve this week. I stayed up until midnight last night writing article updates and then this morning have decided to finish writing my chapter on Budapest in my book. I job hunted before my toast and marmalade, found nothing because it was 7am and will resume the search later this afternoon.

If there's one job hunting lesson I learnt last week it was that just searching for jobs can drain the energy and the life out of your short time on earth. The reason I left the civil service was because I wanted more time to write and because I didn't like the painfully hierarchical and unpleasant structure. Why waste my new found free time trying to conform it to the constraints of a working day? I work best early in the morning and late at night so why try to impose a 9-5 structure when it didn't really work before? Surely the middle of the days should be for doing things, seeing things I wouldn't usually get to see, walking around in circles and catching up on writing?

I quit my graduate job because I needed some space to work out my path but also to work on my path. I can't forget that like I did last week.

The Wheel of Fortune (Kay Starr FYI)

Graduates are unlikely to have experience. Unless you make friends with people who mirror you identically, why not share experiences and skills to help your unemployed friends develop skills, bulk up their CV and become a more well-rounded person.

If you know a grad (or anybody I suppose) looking for a job, and you feel that you have a skill you could share, find out what you could exchange. I know how to use Social Media. So I could approach my friend who is hapless at using Twitter and offer an exchange to develop my dressmaking skills.

Why not set up a skill sharing site? 

Right now, I want to learn/perfect/better myself at the following:

• Night time photography with SLR camera (see above photo for evidence of my lack of ability)
• HTML
• Graphic Design
• Advanced Yoga
• How to make sushi (I have the mats and rice and everything: I'm all set)

I can exchange the following skills and gifts:

• Piano lessons
• How to budget your travel
• How to find the cheapest airflights known to mankind
• Clarinet lessons
• Basic sketching
• Beginners adult ballet
• Thai food
• Mexican food
• Gluten free/vegan baking
• Social media skills
• General fitness/healthy eating
• Tapas. 

Somewhere, there must be a match who wants to exchange what I have (essentially a greedy tummy who learnt how to cook shit) and has what I want.

Just a thought. 

Back to the book. 

So I just got off the telephone

Guardian Jobs: Advert: Junior Content Writer: £18000-20000.

I telephoned the recruitment agency.

"This is a real one off" she said.

"I've been off on holiday for three days" she said.

"There have been 900 applications for this job alone."

And that, my friends, is the current situation.

Jumping through the hoops of frustration

 Today I got some feedback for a job I felt that I had pretty much nailed. I didn't get it after jumping through 3/4 interview hoops. (THREE OUT OF FOUR. I know).

"We thought you were polite, well mannered, kind, friendly, enthusiastic, a pleasure to work with, an asset to be proud of for any team, passionate about our company/brand/identity, intelligent and an excellent communicator. But you didn't tell us how you'd created real change." 

Fair enough. I bombed on one of the pre-prepared interview questions. And why is that? Because I have never created 'real' change. I'm 23. I'm not Mark Zuckerburg. Yes, I worked on the Living Wage Campaign for the cleaners at the Minsitry of Justice. Yes, I co-ordinated fundraising for Burmese refugees in Thai refugee camps, but no, none of these things created 'real, everlasting change'.

Anyway, for those of you who are applying to jobs right now or are also unemployed (ahem, freelancing), I'm sure you know exactly what I mean.

It is an insane achievement to even be invited to interview right now. You could have the bestest CV in the whole wide world, and there's still a fat chance it would just be deleted as it entered the inbox of your recruiter. Job hunting today feels completely arbitrary.

But of course, if you're going through the motions of trying to find a job, you have to try to maintain this positive happy facade. Friends and relatives don't understand.

"Oh, you have so much experience, I'm sure you'll get a job in no time." This comment makes my blood boil. I know that. But yet I'm still job-less. Having experience in 2013 means nothing. Having 'enthusiasm' and 'intelligence' means nothing.

Job hunting is a process of luck. You can market yourself out of the window but essentially, it feels pretty random to me.

Did I mention that I got rejected from a job and the feedback was as follows: You misplaced a comma.

Am I sad and depressed?

Other than a fact that I'm currently house sitting for a friend whose housemates all work for the civil service fast stream, the company I just left, the most depressing thing is that I feel like everything's a little pointless.

That's not to say that I'm sad, depressed or suicidal, it's just you kind of have a little more time on your hands so you start thinking about where it all went wrong/right (if, like me, you're still convinced that leaving your last job was the best thing you could do right now). Here's an example. I was sitting on the bus yesterday at 6pm.

Teenage girl to her grandmother: I had extra art class today but I had to leave early because I needed to go and take my lifeguard exam but then I realised that I had left my swimming costume in the dance studio during rehearsals.

That is exactly what my life was like approximately 5 1/2 years ago. Minus the dance and plus some piano lessons. All the people I've met who are unemployed so far are either moping, don't have any experience because they spent all their time getting drunk at university and doing nothing else, or just aren't applying to anything. I'm in denial, and am calling my new period of unemployment 'freelancing' until the point when I get a new job and I can breathe a sigh of relief that the unstructured days of yesteryear are over. (I actually love it, I just feel guilty that I love it rather than conceding to societal mores and working a 9-5 because I'm not currently getting paid enough to buy milk).

So occasionally you do wonder what the point of it all was. Those of us who have jobs mainly dislike them, some lucky ones love them, and some lucky people who have excellent connections have excellent jobs. Others decide to risk it, change the direction you're pointing in and try to start again.

As my friend Clare's wardrobe says: 'If you're not happy with where your direction is taking you, turn around.'

What does an unemployed graduate do with their spare time?

As a JobHungryGrad, it is likely to assume that I have been applying for jobs by the bucketload. Assume away, but it would be untrue.

Instead, I'm drawing mind-map diagrams when I hunt for jobs. I presume that if I want to work in the future as some kind of writer, let's say journalist, then right now I want to be looking for jobs that allow me to communicate with people. That may not necessarily be a writing job (though bonus points if it is) but it needs to be a job where I get to discuss, debate and engage, because that's what I like doing.

The reason why I left the Civil Service was because I found the work a little dry, and although I applied my all to it, as Einstein said, "When a man sits with a pretty girl, it will feel only like a minute". When he sits with an ugly piece of detailed primary legislation, your life blood will sap out of you drop by drop. Basically, if you enjoy your job, it won't feel like you're working. Instead, it will feel as though you're partying all day.

So what am I trying to do about my sucky predicament? Well, first of all I have to get over the psychological guilt issue that I brought this on myself and others around me. I did, I know it's true, but now let's remedy it:

• 1. I am writing, a lot. I have been spreading my writer's seed around tens of online travel websites, I've been updating my travel blog and I've been adding to my non-fiction book on travelling ethically whilst undertaking budget travel.

• 2. I've started a business with a friend that I've had circulating around my mind for months but had to put it off until I have 'more time'. I now have plenty of time so I'm not getting my teeth into this project, which is fun and very exciting.

• 3. I've started to teach myself comprehensive SEO technique and HTML/CSS. Because my friend laughed at me when I told him I didn't know how to write HTML (I still hold that it was a bit cocky of him to do so) but now, I'm learning. How can I possibly become a good all-round journalist if I can't even code.

• 4. I've resubmitted applications for a Masters in Journalism Course at City University (but I wasn't meant to tell anybody that in case that stops me from getting a job)

• 5. I'm seriously thinking about the offer than was made to me to head out to Cambodia and go and work on the Pnomh Penh Posth for three months. SERIOUSLY THINKING ABOUT IT.

• 6. I'm buying a house.

• 7. I'm training for a 10k. Somewhere, somehow, I've always been a terrible runner but now the time has come to learn how to run 10k. So far the most I've managed is 8k, but I'm so close.

• 8. About to start a fiction book about sex-trafficking. That'll cheer me up no end during my inevitable weeks of job hunting.

• 9. The time has come to perfect the art of making Choux Buns. This time is tomorrow, ready for my boyfriend to come home from work.

• 10. Try to be happy, and if that fails, go out and take pretty photographs.

Greetings from the JobHungryGrad

One week ago I was employed on a graduate scheme.The Civil Service Fast Stream to be precise.  I'd got the job while I was at university, and it was the best and worst thing that's ever happened to me. It was the best thing because potential employers are pretty impressed that I got on the scheme, and the worst, because despite how impressed they all are, it now makes me too qualified to do anything.




Why did I quit my graduate job?

Firstly because it wasn't in the area that I wanted to work in, nor remotely close to it. It was designed to build skills for working in the civil service and for thriving in the civil service. Those on the scheme who were lucky enough to get a job with a corporate posting would probably fare quite well out of work right now, but, believe it or not, writing primary legislation, briefing ministers and writing speaking notes for parliament. Again, everybody seems really impressed by these skills, but once I've left the interview room they're all scratching their heads in realisation that their company 'don't have no ministers to brief' so I'd probably fail. 'Next!'

Secondly because the hierarchy was extreme. People in the civil service laughed about their colleagues being too regimented by grades and levels, and then balked when somebody asked them to do something they felt was beneath them. "But I'm a grade 7!". It's a well structured and interesting place to work, but I felt that I needed to work somewhere with a bit more freedom. I hated the fact that I had to check whether I was allowed to email somebody before I sent them a letter just in case they were too senior for me to approach them.

Thirdly. I want to write. I am happiest when I am writing all day long. It feels like my fingers are dancing when they fly over a keyboard and only when I'm writing do I get the numbing sense of pleasure that this is what I was put on earth to do. However. I'm not an idiot. What jobs are out there for people like me other than the 'satanic grist of the content mill' as the Guardian recently described copywriting websites?

So I have been applying for jobs that I wouldn't mind doing. More on the current situation of job applications from a JobHungryGrad soon. But please note that I am not a HungryJobGrad or worse, Hungry for a Graduate Job. I am looking for a job that isn't necessarily for graduates, but one that is interesting, requires some brain work and most of all, I get to communicate with others, regardless of whether they've been working here for 6 months or 60 years.